Dance Rehearsal

Sometimes Clubfoot effects our lives more than we want people to know.

Last week the Miss New Jersey participants had dance rehearsal for our upcoming competition.

Within the first few steps I was in pain and knew I was in for a long night. Because of my disability I have to fudge a lot of dance moves.  There are just some things that my feet and ankles will not allow me to do.  To people who don’t know about my disability, I probably look like I’m just a dancing mess, or I don’t know what I’m doing. When asked what line placement we wanted for the performance, I volunteered to be in the back.  I should have been thrilled being with my sisters and learning choreography; they all seemed to be killing it!  But instead, I let myself feel down and defeated. I ended up in the back room crying from the pain, and felt ashamed and embarrassed for not being able to dance like the other girls. I woke up the next morning in pain, unable to move, and had to ice my feet.

Making my negatives into positives.

I sit here thinking about the support I get from not only my fellow sisters, but Miss New Jersey herself! They did not judge my mess ups and checked on me when I let my emotions get the best of me. My sisters are so supportive and do more for me than they will ever know.  When I couldn’t get off the ground after dancing, one reached her hand out and pulled me up without my asking for help.

After rehearsal many of my sisters checked on me, and even made sure I was okay to drive and able to get home safe. Dance numbers are just a part of the Miss New Jersey experience and I am doing them to the best of my ability.  I know I am doing almost the impossible for someone with my limitations, and I know that it’s all worth it.  I can’t wait to take the stage next week as the first competitor living with Clubfoot and Limb Deformity.